Still Confused

I don’t wanna die
But I’m not keen on livin’ either
Pain and joy at the same time
Everytime I see her
You think you got a clear situation
But for my own I’m still confused
One side’s back from vacation
The other one feels used

And If you think you could tell
What I have been through
You gotta go from heaven to hell
Now you think you still can do
I still try to climb up that ladder
But keep on falling down
Don’t know if it’ll ever get better
You know where I’ll be found

But hey now I’m over it
I don’t think of you anymore
But when I saw you again
It hurted like it did before

I’ve been sittin’ next to you
But it seemed like you’ve been sitting next to someone else
You just put me into your bookshelf
And you asked me what I’ve been thinkin’
Well I was just spaced out
And you know I’m not teeelin’ the truth
Actually I was thinking of you

I just woke up
And thought my dreams were real
I let my eyelids drop
So I don’t have to feel

With you I spend the good times of my life
But after sunny days it starts to rain
Its always joy and pain
I’m sitting here by own
And I’m thinkin of you just like I did before
But now it realy does hurt ‘cause your not here anymore

Who likes to get hurt
Who wantsto have his nose bleed
Who likes to fall into dirt
I do so hurt me